Love is a building road...

I am learning so much what it means to love. Loving by your flesh is so different than loving in the spirit. For me, to love Vin I must rely completely on God to be my deep love I feel for him. I fail time and time again to love him with Gods perfect love, I take matters into my own hands and think I can somehow love him in a good honest way but in reality it's such a selfish way to love someone when we try and love them apart from God. This may sound harsh... Maybe I am not explaining it right, all I know is I hurt and get hurt when I give and receive love apart from Christ. I can't say how it happens but every single day I feel so much closer and deeper in love with Vin. He is the most special amazing gift God has ever given me and I pray I cherish and care for him in a way that honors God and brings glory to Him!
It has been a hard past few weeks. My body is tired and my emotions seem to be ultra sensitive. That makes going through the day hard but I am trusting that God will see my desperation for Him to to take me over! "It is no longer I who live but Christ lives in me!" I desire that so much! Work is not as fun as I would like it to be :-) I am sure I am not the only person who day dreams of the perfect job.
Vin and I spent the day at the beach. We haven't had much time just us. It's hard and I become selfish when we don;t get to spend "us" time together and my feelings take over my mind and heart. He has been so busy with lots of new things in his life, and I am SO thankful God is taking him in all these new directions. Most of all I love being by his side through it all and I hope I never have to miss a moment of it!
Well I had lots more written but I deleted it somehow so I am not really feeling like re-writing it. Anyway Goodnight and God Bless!
kesh~